Parkinson’s: Blessings and Acceptance
December 2021
Past-Posts
I have had so many treasures dropped in my lap this past week. Which is very appropriate for this weeks Past-Posts For December, 2021. They Are:
How Do You See Yourself?
Gratitude
The Blessings of Sinemet!
Poop!
I was feeling pretty good in December of 2021. In the Blessings of Sinemet- I was up to taking 3 pills a day, 5 hours apart of Carbidopa/Levodopa (generic for Sinemet.) They really helped me to feel like the me I was used to. I even got to do some art projects that I had put off for a while.
In “How Do you See Yourself?” I worried about how my friends and loved ones would view me when I started to look like I have Parkinson's. (At that point in my journey, no one would know, unless I told them.) I wrote “if I view myself as a person with a snark companion, different from before, but OK, it might make a difference in how some others view me. Not everyone but maybe the ones who care and I care about.”
I have come to the point that some (it feels like most) of the time, when I go out, the Snark struts by my side. Or I have asked a friend to come for tea, or I am talking on the phone and the Snark is making faces at me. He is obvious.
What I now know is the importance of the 'I' in “how do I view myself?” Not for what others might feel. Because basically, I have no control over that. Whatever my body is doing, if I am judging it, instead of accepting it, it does make a difference in how I feel and how well/ or how badly, my body will react to the snark's prod.
I might tell people quickly that I have Parkinson's and my medicine has worn off. Then I might try to ignore the Snark, but I want to go home. If he is particularly obnoxious, I really want to go home. So no, I haven't learned, my lesson yet. I think it has to do with accepting and moving on. Guess what? It's 2 and a half years later and I often have to re-swallow the acceptance pill. I'm pretty sure, it can be learned by practice and meditation. Both of which are.. not.. my... favorite words. (I feel like I should apologize to the word -Meditation- You are wonderful, I know it, but, I still don't meditate very often.)
One of the other posts was on “Gratitude.” I have done better on this one.
I Started a Gratitude Journal.
“The post started with Fran saying, name 5 things you are grateful for each night when you go to bed and each morning when you get up. And she mentioned things like, not needing someone to help you get out of bed or help you to the bathroom. And I thought Wow, yes, not now, not yet. Could be in my future, but not today.”
Now, at almost 3 years older, those of us with aging issues and probably some sort of health ones too, and with friends or relatives with health or aging challenges, Fran's choices of what to be grateful for, sounds a lot more pithy than before.
“There is so much to be grateful for. I decided to carry a small notebook to write down things as they happened. It is so easy to forget the good things that happen in life, so easy to remember the bad.”
I still agree with that whole paragraph. There is so much to be grateful for.
But I have not remembered to carry a small notebook with me. I do have 3 or 4 of them that are next to my bed and by my computer and, most days, I write down 5 things I am grateful for, when I get up or when I go to bed.
February 5th, 2024
I am so grateful for for Corrine's footnotes:
December, 2021
Footnotes from Corrine
I am grateful to an elder, in the nursing home I worked at. I was a young woman, an auxiliary nurse, the elder advised me to "make memories." She said that to live life that way I will find that the memories will sustain me, comfort me and remind me of the importance of making more each and every day. Basically she was saying that each day is an opportunity and a blessing to cherish and find something beautiful about.
I have found that doing an almost, daily Gratitude check in, has been a very useful and welcome topper upper to my day.
Last post, Is “POOP!”
“Lately, I discovered 'Calm.' It's a magnesium supplement powder that makes up into a drink. It's called 'Calm' -it doesn't make me feel calm but it does help me keep constipation away.”
“I've asked my doctor ….and my cardiologist... and my pharmacist... and my neurologist... and my movement disorder specialist if it was OK to take Calm and they all said yes. And I almost believe them. But I do keep wondering when and if the magic will stop.”
The magic stopped about 2 months ago-- Dang why did I ever tempt fate?
Dec. 2021
Footnotes from Corrine
HAH! Movement Disorder Specialist should know
“HAH! Back at 'cha. I just got it Corrine! You made me laugh! š
Nancy and the Snark
********************
Footnotes From Corrine : hee hee!
Sometimes it’s really helpful rereading old blog posts or journals to see the patterns, the changes, and what stays the same. It really helps put things into perspective.
How I saw you and see you is my Nancy, art pal, michief maker, jafapal, bestie only now with a snark sidekick. It hasn’t changed who you inherently are, just that we’ve had to adjust to ,tolerate , ignore or placate the intrusive little bastard.
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